How to Naturally Manage Negative Influences That Are Keeping You Stuck, Sick, and Stressed, So You Can Feel Amazing and THRIVE
Have you ever heard the term, “TAP OUT”?
In betting it means that you are out of money, in boxing and fighting and wrestling, that signals that you have had enough of the pain and beating are ready to surrender and not hurt anymore.
Growing up as kids, our family’s way of resolving arguments was to box, aka: fight. Whenever my brothers and I would argue and annoy our parents, the method of dispute resolution was very backwoods and brutal. Especially on our young and still developing minds.
We would be told by our dad to get the boxing gloves on and get out front and resolve it. Winner of the fight would be determined by the first one with a bloody nose or the first to “TAP OUT”. Often it would be me winning over my younger brother who despite being 17 months younger, was twice my size and body weight, as was my 3 years younger, other baby brother, who, ironically, often was never even involved in the original squabble, but pulled into the conflict anyway!
So here I am, victor over one of them, as a nonviolent person, hating that I am being made to fight and cause my brother pain, yet terrified. You see, I was told, that if I do not fight him, I would have to fight my dad, who would not hold back the punches, so to say.
So I would box my baby brother. He was faster, and stronger than the first one, and could throw one hell of a mean round house punch, one that knocked me out a few times and bloodiedmy nose every time. Looking back, I shudder and still shake my head, as it would be just minutes before my first brother would run in the house saying “Mom, Candy gave me a bloody nose”, it would be me following in suit very quickly after him, crying the same thing about my second brother! Our mom’s only response was to yell from inside the house to our dad to “stop making those kids box each other”, and that was it. Until the next fight and it was back to same damn nightmare experience.
The irony of that whole experience looking back is, I do not feel it served either me or my siblings in any healthy way. Not only was it a neglectful and dangerous way to parent, but it is alsosadistic to make, and watch, your children beat each other as a form of punishment. It was also abuse of our minds and body, most notably, our fragile young brains and one of the contributing factors to my traumatic brain injury limitations.
Parents are supposed to protect, teach us, and nurture us, and sadly, I do not feel like I had much of that at all. I certainly did not feel valued, valuable, safe, and loved. Everything was a fight, from being able to have the right to have dinner and in really tough time, we struggled to have enough to eat in general due to our poverty level, to having to fight to feel heard and figure out how to survive the world I was stuck in. That is the key word STUCK, keep note of that, we will be back to elaborate.
This setup for future disaster with disease, addiction and mental illness was not evident then, but hindsight is never in sight when you need it. I share this story to illustrate how early the disconnect started for me.
Now, while as an adult, I have found forgiveness for the entire experience, I was not always that way. As a young teen and young adult, I was angry, lost, suspicious, and untrusting and always ready to fight for what was mine and not a bit hesitant to numb out the pain of the memories that haunt me of the terrors I have survived.
I would do anything to feel better and avoid the memories. Unknowingly, those actions are what was keeping me STUCK, SICK and STRESSED out. It was always a temporary fix to the problem, like a band aid, it stopped the pain, but never healed the core wounds.
I did not know what self-love was, all I knew is I had massive anxiety, depression, insomnia, mood swings, and appetite issues.If you can relate to this and have wondered how the hell did I get here and how do I get out, read on, the answers of how are coming next!
Just as this was painful to live through, it was even more painful to live WITH. I feel the most sinister fallout of this, was my low competency life skills of stress management. My inability to understand how to regulate emotions, relax, self soothe to create calm from chaos and do so in a manner that was not toxic anddestructive had kept me STUCK, SICK, and STRESSED out.
It would make sense to me that because from the age of 8 on, all I had ever known was fight to resolve solutions, use substances to resolve negative emotions, and even used codependent relationships to avoid myself, and the storyline that I call “tales and untruths” of it all would:
• “help me relax.”
• “help me feel better/less pain, worry, stress.”
• “help me feel like life was fun when it was miserable.”
• “help me feel like I was in control.”
And yet, all it ever truly did, was keep me STUCK, SICK, and STRESSED.
Are you like I used to be and find yourself avoiding your current reality and TAPPING OUT/CHECKING OUT?
• Are you arguing for your limiting belief of “I don’t deserve to be healthy and feel amazing”?
• Are you engaging in the toxic trait of seeking outside of self for ease and calm?
• Are you someone like myself who learned the toxic traits of self-abuse to regulate emotions of depression, anxiety, worry, fear, lack, lonely?
• Are you someone like myself that found the negative habits in the past that have now become familiar and works, but are now creating more *chaos over calm? (*poor health, financial struggles/decreased wealth earning capacity due to substance abuse & mental health, no healthy connections in relationships, no sense of being lovable and safe, decreased, or absent sense of worthiness)?
So how do we manage all this naturally and feel amazing?
For one, it is a hell of a lot more affordable and with exception of one, they are able accessed at level of FREE & EASY! They also can be acquired for small to large investments depending on what you are seeking!
It is going to blow your mind how easy it is and how fun it can be to have mastery of your emotions and no longer be addicted to them or any other substance to help you feel relaxed, calm, or happy.
I want you to know that I feel you. You are safe with me; I hold a JUDGEMENT FREE ZONE for my fellow humans.
We are all learning and processing a lot of experiences, and we are doing amazing. But, in seriousness, I understand your pain and confusion and anger. I want to help you find some peace and calm, so you can stop feeling STUCK, SICK, and STRESSED too.
THE 5 WAYS TO MANAGE NEGATIVE HABITS NATURALLY TO FEEL AMAZING
I know you are ready for the solution to your stuck-ness, sickness, and stressed-out mind, body, and spirit, so let us:
• Dance Like No One is Watching (also good is slow stretches and breathing mindfully through the movement.
• Breath 4-5-7 Count (you can do 4-6-8 or even 5-5-7...find one that feels most natural to your inhale. I teach this to my clients, simple and can be done anywhere and no one will be able to tell you are doing it. Also GREAT For helping to quit smoking, as smoking is breathing but also inhaling TOXINS in the number of over 4,000 per cig. To do this simply inhale through nose for count of 4-then hold for a 5 count and slowly exhale through pursed lips as you count to 7. Repeat for up 5 minutes, however, I get results within the first 2 rounds. It blew my mind how well it works to calm the body and mind. I go deeper in my Namaste Away and THRIVE book, (available on Amazon or my website). In short, it sends the calming chemicals to the brain that cause us to feel happy, calm and require no one else and is FREE!!)
• Meditate in Stillness to TAP IN this is where the true ZEN is. (We are always too busy and avoiding this action step will cause an overflow in the mind and body that creates disharmony. Stillness creates a deep sense of calm. Let your thoughts just be, do not judge them, just watch them float on by like a leaf on a stream.
• Journal Daily to release and flow. (EASY PEASY…just write, scribble …trust me, do this and the words will come as will deeper awareness and clarity.)
• Hypnosis: And when those old toxic ways will not go, hypnosis will provide the wisdom so you can grow. (I have not done this one yet. I am getting ready to do EMDR which is similar in some ways in its ability to access impaired parts of the brain and rewire those limiting beliefs and helps to stop the mind from being in state of hypervigilance from complex post-traumatic stress that rewires both brain and body.)
So there are the 5 ways to Namaste Away from toxic habits and manage negative influences and feel amazing! Bonus is, if these are done in nature, it boosts the detox power and recharge is on rapid response.
In summary, if your body does not feel appreciated because of negative influences, and limiting belief tapes playing on repeat, decreased movement, and nature exposure, poor or inadequate nutrition (processed sugar is not a treat that your body wants or needs), combined with low or no self-love connection, it is going to cause disease and dissatisfaction in your life experience.
After trauma, coping is difficult, with new truths and tactics, and not using the TAP OUT or NUMB OUT, the ability to feel amazing is achieved when you decide to get aligned and BEALL IN!
Stop looking for outside sources to feel calm/loved/relaxed/safe or to not feel at all.
All you need is inside YOU.
• You are a complete YOU-niverse of divine, infinite possibilities and abundance.
• You will not get there from living in toxic, negative habits, mindsets, or environments.
• You must get the curiosity goggles on and step onto the empowering path in a journey of curiosity with the courage for repetition and surrender to flow of NOW! Which can be WOW, if you attune to your highest vibration station using unconditional and radical self-love to honor and nourish instead of tap out, negate and numb out.
Emotions and feelings are messengers.
(See page 32 of Namaste Away & Thrive:
MIND DIET MANTRA: My emotions are a good thing. They let me know I am alive.)
Stop shooting the numbing messenger and then get upset with your life because it sucks and is not what you desire! You are creating the outside from the inside!
There is no force against you…except your limiting beliefs and those, my lovely and divine souls, are rewireable with the right help and guidance.
I only touched the surface in this article, but if you want to go deeper, by book Namaste Away and THRIVE: Release Negative Influences and Love Yourself is available for purchase.
If you want something more personal and want to interact with me, my brand-new signature total transformation program Aligned Self is available and has options for levels of investment.
Aligned Self is the classroom where you will learn, implement,and shift from the rewire of the old beliefs and habits that have kept you STUCK, SICK, and STRESSED so you can shift into Divine Alignment and that is the Bliss + Freedom + Abundance + Peace & Calm that you are seeking.
I loved sharing these 5 tips to Feel Amazing with you and I amcurious – let me know in the comments -which one you would like to try and share your comments and challenges!
I would love to hear from you.
If you are ready to go deeper, here is the link to my book Namaste Away and THRIVE
It is the guide that you need! It is packed with tools to help you to release the negative influences to allow space for self-exploration as you Namaste Away and THRIVE!
In this exploration, you will discover the buried treasure that you once sought in the influences outside of self.
You will accept the differences and then alchemize the pain of loss, betrayal, rejection, and lack as you chip away at the negative influences created by trauma and controlled by ego.
This will reveal the blueprint of your beliefs.
As you detox, align and return to self, the chaos and struggles of others will fall away as their energy is no longer in alignment with yours.
The intention of NAMASTE is alignment.
In alignment you will shine bright, illuminating and releasing negative influences and powerfully transform your life.
When you employ The Five Pillars of Transformation with the intention of ‘Namaste’, and stay away from negative influences, healing is a possibility, and you will become the hero of your own story.
No longer will you need to control everything, and you will feel happy, abundant, and THRIVE IN THE FREEDOM being YOU!
These Five Pillars of Transformation are the foundations available in the Aligned Self coaching packages in group and there are limited spots for one-to-one coaching with me privately.
CONNECT WITH ME: Please connect with me to obtain more information.
@TheDivineAlignmentSage (Mindset Mastery)
@HurtNoMoreHealer (Narcissistic Abuse Help)
@WellnessWithCandice (Wellness & Lifestyle)
Reach out to me and together we will RESET YOUR GROOVE! Write a new story, step out of the pain, let go and love you through your self-care as you create full body wellness!
Who is The Divine Alignment Sage aka Coach Candice?
A tenacious, passionate, empathetic, and creative soul who is on a mission to bring healing to humanity by teaching the motto, "Be Love", to create a happier, blissful world by helping souls align to their true purpose and THRIVE.
She overcame limiting beliefs, codependency, lifelong traumas and loss, self-abuse, addictions, autoimmune illnesses, chronic pain/fibromyalgia and beat anxiety and depression when she let go of the ego and LOVED herself unconditionally.
This radical approach saved her life and was all through daily acts of kindness and radical self-love through intentional self-care and living an aligned life and fully present in the moment and loving herself unconditionally that helped her achieve alignment and recover from trauma.
*Founder & Owner of EmBodyE Wellness, Zen Hikes & Nature Adventures
*#BeLove Movement Pioneer
*Self-Love Alchemy Expert™️
*Certified Master Health/Life & Mindset Transformation Expert
*Women’s Empowerment Coach
*Life Skills Competency Educator
*Certified Medical Assistant
*Creator and Host of the RESET YOUR GROOVE PODCAST SHOW
RESET YOUR GROOVE PODCAST SHOW-Write A New Story:
Mind Diet, Balanced Bliss, and Kick Sugar Cravings, PTSD & Trauma Recovery Talks/Workshops
*Founder of Harmony For Humanity Nonprofit & *22HaloProject.org (coming 2021)
*Creator of the:
5 to THRIVE, Mind Diet Program, 8 Self-Love Gateways, 7 Steps to Now is Formula, 5 to Feel Free Formula, 12 Steps to Freedom Addiction & Codependency, Balanced Bliss
*Global Like Skills Ambassador
Global Presence Life Skills Ambassador @ Parenting 2.0 https://www.parenting2pt0.org/the-global-presence/ambassadors/